I was at the NUS Windsurf December Training Camp 2010. This time, I was quite amazed by the goodie bag. There was a lot of useful stuff for people who windsurf quite often (or exposed to the sun for prolonged periods).

One of the thing I am going to post is the Sunplay's SPF 130. I'm impressed that the organizers managed to get this item considering that sunblocks doesn't come cheap. I really hope they can get it again for their upcoming July Camp!

Nevertheless, the sunblock was great! 130 is definitely more than the average and offers longer protection. The design was fantastic, small and easily packed for convenience. When I applied it to my skin the texture was smooth, not very sticky (or oily) unlike other brands. That is something that I liked best. It was easy to apply as well and gets absorbed by the skin pretty quickly.

Definitely recommend it to my fellow windsurfers! =)

Reflections of a Thesis Student

As I sit in the lab now, reflecting on what came over me to want to embark on this ardous journey, I suddenly realised how far I have come since then.

Right from the month of April, I had first started looking for supervisors (and plentiful rejections of course). It was really tough convincing others to take you in. You do so much research and ended up the prof can't take you in. It almost seemed like a waste of time, considering that you should be studying for the exams that will determine your fate to get into Honours. But in retrospect, I learnt the importance of being proactive. No one will tell you what to do, you have to do it yourself.

Flashback to the month of May/June, I was still looking for potential supervisors. Not that there wasn't any available prof, but blame it on my insistence. I didn't want to do a topic that I didn't have interest in (abnormal, cog, developmental etc). To me, it was a tough decision to stick to my plans (which could ultimately fail) but I did it anyway. It was as though some higher-being finally took pity and I finally found one. It was immense joy, but short-lived for I know there was a long way ahead.

Things didn't turn up too well in July,/Aug, because my supervisor was constantly away for conferences. No advice or guidelines to follow. In the end, I had to "find my way in the dark". Constantly tweaking and refining (which I believed everyone else was like that too). But oh well, that tough period was over. Especially when you are still taking special semester and cca.

September/October passed by like a flash, when I was still tweaking the proposals, experimental designs and grants (yes I applied but didn't get in the end). The feeling was like fighting a war with no ammunition. Totally sucks. Its even worse when you hear stories of how others have finished collecting their samples and you barely started. Near the end of October was disaster week (for those that know). Thesis was in the laptop, laptop spoilt. Fortunately I did a backup in my external harddisk. Unfortunately that harddisk spoilt too =(

From October to November, it was mad rush to recovery. Had to redo the lit review (based on memory power) as well as the data collection. It was also this period that I learn the value of friendship. So many people have supported me along the way. No man is an island indeed. Thank you all.

Now to the present moment, I am still surviving this period, doing data collection. Things are equally bad now, and I expect it to last all the way till graduation.

But one thing is for sure, this is too important to fail now. Regardless of what happen, I await the 4th April 2011.

It's the holidays. But it also means 116 days left to doomsday.

Nevertheless, I ought to enjoy my very last holiday before I graduate.

"I want to be a survivor.
And I know I will be."

The same verse kept resounding in my mind these days.

Celebrations

The art of celebration requires some skill.

But I don't mean that people don't know how to celebrate. It's quite common sense that if you experience some happy occassion, you will sense joy and some positive arousal that you want to share with others. I believe that everyone knows how to do this (hopefully).

Today I want to reflect about some other form of celebration. It is the art of celebrating "small success". This is something that not many people would know or practice. After all in this society, everything is about BIG Success. Having a good promotion, a new house, car, 5As for their examinations etc.

Very rarely do you hear people celebrate things like "Yay I met a new friend today, I finally got C+ instead of the usual C, or something like that." This is a question I have been wondering for some time. Why don't people celebrate these things?

It is still an improvement from the usual outcomes and we should celebrate them like how we celebrate other successes. But apparently to most people, it is not deemed significant enough to call for a party. I'm not exactly sure the reason, but I guess maybe people are not contented with what they have? or they expected somemore? or they just don't even bother?

I shall not comment about the rest of the people. But to me, good things don't happen all the time. Haha. I had so many hopes and dreams dashed in my 24 years of life. If I didn't learn this skill earlier, there might not have been anything significant that is worth celebrating at all. I could have very well sunk into a depression when I couldn't get this or that.

But those stories are true. I used to be like many others, wishing to have only the best. But after failing so many times, one night I just got "enlightened" (for a lack of a better word) and decided there should be more to life. Since then, I could feel a permanent change in me.

It's not that I no longer want the best for myself. I will strive to be the best I can be. But now, I no longer get affected as much when I fail. Failure has become an integral part of me, that I learnt to celebrate anything positive in my life, be it a big or small success. Things could have gotten worse but it didn't and this deserved some form of recognition as well.

For example, I looked back at how things would have been different if I have taken a different course in JC, or if I had studied harder to make it to triple science class, or if my family business didn't fail . The old me would be so full of regrets. But this new me is no longer very affected by these failures. Instead I see opportunity to seek out a new path that I didn't thought I would take maybe 10 years ago.

Life is no longer the same as before. Since we cannot predict with certainty what is going to happen in the future, it might be good to celebrate every success in life. For it could very well be the last one.

So treasure this moment. Celebrate.

I'm dying from psychometrics! =(

Somehow I didn't find it strange that I haven't blog for an entire month.

While there are many things that has occurred throughout this period, I seem less inclined to want to talk about it anymore. Which is weird since this is what this blog is all about.

Probably the most significant events that had occurred during my blogging hiatus would be the Sports Club NEXUS 2010 as well as the YouthsLead "Know Thy Neighbor" Project.

Don't really feel much like blogging, so I will keep these two events for next time. Today I will blog more about my ongoing thoughts.

"I guess I am now at the crossroads once again, and it's just like all the other ones I have encountered so far for the past 24 years. Yet somehow this time round it feels different. I'm not exactly sure of the cause. After all, I have already made so many decisions in life.

Watching the news reporting the death of Mrs Lee & Dr Balaji made me very emotional,however its not because I know them personally. In fact, I have only heard their names once in a while on TV. But I wondered why they are so willing to sacrifice their time and effort for society. Especially the case of Dr Balaji, who was battling cancer and yet continues to report for work. What is the energy that sustain this?

They could have retired and enjoyed their remaining lives, but why did they choose to contribute to a society that sometimes doesn't even appreciate their effort? Its the same case for LKY or any other politicians. They could have very well looked for a private sector job and earned a comparable, if not higher salary. From an economics point of view, I just don't understand why they will pick a harder path to go.

I don't have an answer to it. Yet somehow I get inspired by their stories that I wished I could be like them too. It's not because of the the pay because ultimately its hard to match up to the private sector in the long run. It's also not because of the recognition because I have seen and experienced what it is like to do grassroots work as well. More often than not, these people sacrifice their time/effort and end up with criticism and complains.

Why did they still do it in the end? I prefer to think that it's a calling. It is the realization that there is something larger than your own existence. Something that will ultimately outlive you.

What then will be my life project?

I guess I will just have to continue thinking."

p.s this Thursday is Full Colors Award . Hopefully can get Best Water Club too.

As I read this article "when is the last leaf falling?"

I can't stop but feel a sense of sadness and apprehension. What will the future hold for us?

Today was a pleasant session at PE.

As teacher's day is approaching, Simon told the class to make a card for their respective teachers in PE. I think this is a wonderful idea. Not that I want to preach the noble acts of teachers but I truly think they deserve every bit for their effort all this while.

It's good to inculcate a value of appreciation in our kids today. Remember my sunflower post? Appreciating what others have done for you can go a long way, even if the act is very small by itself. The world would be a much better place if people can start focusing on appreciating, not criticizing.

The card I saw today is one such example. It totally surprised me that the student that used to create the most problems in class actually did an appreciation card for us volunteers as well. Speechless but very much happy inside.

Sure brightened up my day today! =)

Congrats to Audrey Yong for winning Bronze in the Windsurfing Category in YOG!

Let's hope this success can spur more interest in the local windsurfing scene =)

arghh... I feel like windsurfing now.

YOG begins tomorrow!

Raise your hand for our generation

Fly the flags of every nation

Reaching out for that moment in our lives

Raise your hand for our generation

Living out your aspirations

Time to fly way beyond the skies

It's time to be inspired by the cheers of success, the tears of disappointment, the dreams of the every athletes, and the hopes of our generation =)

This is our time to shine.

Today's PE session was all about National Day.

We started by watching some videos of Singapore in the past and did up a poster which messages that we would like to dedicate to the country. While we were drawing the posters, national day songs like "We are Singapore", "Count on Me Singapore" , "Home" etc was playing very loudly in the background. We ended up singing the songs while doing our work. Haha

The kids are super enthusiastic about the songs that they kept requesting for YOG songs as well. I heard the "Everytime" song for like 3-4 times. It's also super interesting to end off the session with the national anthem as well.

Can't believe I have been absent for more than a month from PE. It feels good to be back =)

Just when I thought I could enjoy my one and only week of holiday, I ended up with a swollen leg.

But at least I got to experience the 25 knots wind at east coast before I got swept away by the huge waves. Even if it is for less than 5 mins.

Fortunately no fracture or broken bones, otherwise I doubt this challenging attempt to conquer the waves is worth it.

This post is way overdue.

I attended Module 2 of the YouthsLead program on the 16-18 July (which is right after the windsurfing camp). The camp was titled Serving with Passion and most of the activities were targeted at understanding "what drives us to volunteer?"

We first started out with a talk on the K&P model of leadership and went through our results based on the surveys we given to our co-workers, managers and direct reports. This is based on the principle of 360 degree feedback to understand our own leadership behaviors from the different perspectives. I will share my results personally if you are interested to know more.

Anyway, the second day of the camp started off with our presentation of the various Cs groups in the PA network, eg. CDC, CCC, CMCC, IAEC etc. We then had a discussion panel with some of the directors of the Youth Division in PA. This was followed by another discussion panel with some of the grassroot leaders and volunteer leaders at night.

Before the day ended, we also had to organise a "Kopitalk" and dialogue session with Dr Maliki bin Osman and other senior directors on our last day. Unfortunately, I decided to take on a personal challenge and took up the role of chief faciliator of the event.

It was quite an interesting experience now that I look back at it. If I didn't take that plunge, I would never have known what it is like to be an emcee of the talk and moderator of the dialogue session. haha

I now offically *heart NACLI =)

The busy week is finally over!

Come to think of it, I can't believe I managed to survive 2 consecutive camps in a week (including a 20% mid term + 20% presentation + 15% essay submission).

Windsurf Camp No. 5 went quite smoothly I think. It's a good feeling to see how much the committee have grown since it first started in Sept last year. I could still vividly remembered the challenge to bond the comm members and guide them with their job scope while trying to pull my cap at the same time.

There are lots of sacrifices made in the end, but the results justified the amount of effort put in. This is the first camp I didn't have to micro-manage. Everyone knew what they had to do, and helped each other out. I particularly have to thank xiaojie for organizing the team well.

It's heartening to see how your own actions can generate the interest to windsurf in others. One year ago, most of the seniors are still in their first year. They were struggling to keep themselves above the board, up-hauling all the time and never really got to surf. I remembered telling them this "Windsurfing is not an easy sport, you have to put in effort and practice to see results. As long as you keep trying, I promise 1 year later you guys will be a better windsurfer."

To see how they have transformed since then was quite emotional for me. I am glad I didn't give up when I was in year 1 as well. Otherwise all this will never have been possible.

As I gear myself to the last year of school life, I find myself saying the same things again to the new batch of freshmen. I am confident that the new generations will be ready in time to come =)

As promised, I decided to take a break and blog about the balloon incident that is so popular in my facebook.

The entire incident happened like this. It was the second day of the Project Excellence Camp, and one of the activity was an "amazing race" inside vivocity. As the facilitator I had to run all around with the entire shopping mall with the kids to complete the different tasks.

Everything ended successfully (Our team came in top!) and we were taking a break at level 1 near the entrance. While we were waiting, some of the kids and I saw this person dressed in all white going into the mall with a big bunch of balloons. It appears that there is a wedding proposal going on and it was meant to be a surprise for the bride-to-be.

A while later, the same guy was carrying this blindfolded lady (which I presume to be the bride) with the balloons. As he approached the entrance, he suddenly passed me the entire bunch of balloons on the way out. I was with the kids then, and in a flash everyone wanted a balloon from me.

The security guard appeared at this time and thought I was giving away the balloons and ask me to do some crowd control. Being the inexperienced balloon-giver, I was shocked then. With a big bunch of kids chasing after the balloons, I had to run out of the mall to give.

And as the kids come to get the balloons, the parents of other kids joined in the fight (members of the public at the mall). Apparently they must have thought there is free balloon to be given out. Fortunately Zhenyou shared some of my burden, otherwise I doubt I could survive that scene.

The parents are super violent, my fingers got stuck to the balloon strings and they still continue to fight over it. Even if the strings are tangled, they just pull and made things worse (with my fingers in it). It was one crazy day to remember.

And my string-burnt hands can testify to it.

I thought it might be a good thing to change my blog layout to something more organised and easier to read.

And terror struck. I forgot to backup the links and the tagboard. Will update again soon when I fix the problem.

I need to ask everyone some questions.

1) How do you tell if a person is rude towards you at work/school?

2) Why do you think people are rude to others at work/school?

3) What do you usually do if people are rude to you at work/school?

4) How do you try to reduce the rude behavior in the other person, or can it be reduced?

Please give me some advice on the following. Otherwise I can never sleep well.

My THESIS PLEDGE

I know this is not an easy path,

I know there are many obstacles ahead,

I know I will experience stress, fustration and disappointment,

I know I might fail somehow,

I know this is one lonely journey to take,

I know it will make or break me,

But I also know CP is one who doesn't give up without a fight.

I don't want to be someone who is afraid to try, and yet regret not trying in the end.

Instead I want to be a survivor...

And I know I will be.

The journey of 12,000 words begins.

**Let this pledge be the constant reminder to stay motivated and focused all the way. Till the date 8th April 2011**

Totally busy with the Project Excellence camp the past week. Extremely exhausted by I'm loving it =)

Now its back to school once again!

p.s I will blog about the balloon incident pretty soon (when I managed to find time to do so)

I'm back from module 1 of the PA YouthsLead program! It was definitely an enriching session at OBS, even though the duration is rather short (2D2N). Still I got to know new friends and learnt more about myself.

But the most important thing I received from this was I found back the very fire I had for volunteerism in the first place. Come to think of it, time does pass very quickly. Before I know it, I'm almost nearing the "3 year itch" of volunteering.

I have to agree that my passion is no longer as strong as when I first started. Perhaps it is because I got so much more other commitments at hand now than in the past. I feel that I am no longer putting 100% as much as I would like to. Volunteering can be hard work at times.

But during my time in OBS, I reflected a lot. I got to this realization that though I can no longer contribute as much as in the past, but the very little act of contributing itself is enough. I was so particularly inspired by the interaction with the other volunteers. To hear how volunteering changed their lives, no matter how small is enough to rekindle my fire.

I am now committed to making volunteering a part of my life =)

I'm back from taiwan~! yay

Tons of updates to do here, but I will post up the travel entry pretty soon. Looks like I'm going to be staying in sch for another year =)

CACTUS 2010 was a blast!

Attended the first school performance in my 3 years of university life, and I was treated to a fusion of music, voices and dance. It was a display of dances/singing from the various sub clubs like social & ballroom dance, d'hoppers, Jazzitude, BBoys, Resonance, Voices etc.

What an Amazing night!

Time sure flies. At the blink of an eye, I'm already approaching weekends.

It's about time to start doing my readings, but somehow I can't seem to find the motivation to do it. Especially when it is so alluring to watch movies, eat good food, shop around etc. I basically spent my Monday & Tuesday watching 2 very good movies - Schindler's List and Amadeus. Wednesday was outing to eat potatofarmland (omg good stuff!), Friday attending the YouthsLEAD launch dinner.

I can't wait for the OBS module 1. I seriously need some adventure in the wild.

Should I continue with the PA YouthsLead 2010 programme?

While I am extremely happy to be selected for this, I don't know whether I have time to do a good job in it. After all, there are no clashes currently (since the special semester timetable is not out yet), but I am not exactly sure if I can handle doing windsurf camp, special semester and this YouthsLead activities (3 camps + 1 GRO attachment project) on top of doing research for thesis.

In a Dilemma.

Attended several inspiring talk by the various speakers working in the different fields of psychology in Singapore. There were topics on working as a counselor, educational psychologist, forensic psychologist, clinical psychologist, industrial/organizational psychologist as well as being a psycho-entrepreneur.

We also learnt about how to get into graduate school in psychology and the best of all panel discussion with some of the more distinguished leaders in the local field (for example our own Prof George Bishop!). Had a great time knowing more about the field where my passion lies =)

Crazy mambo night out with the windsurfers (char, jocene, xingyan, yew ming and jeron)!

Drank alcohol as though it was dirt cheap (which is true in a way), and I couldn't even walk in a straight line, nor count multiples of seven even before we went into phuture. It's interesting to see the people you usually see behaving in all kinds of weird manner yesterday. haha

Anyway, psychology talk tomorrow and saturday. Followed by dinner with lost-long friend penguin and Project Excellence volunteering. Sunday's up for windsurfing.

I foresee a busy week ahead, yet satisfying at the same time =)

Sunflower!

Thanks for the Iron Man 2 movie treat~!!! Such a pleasant surprise (totally gave me a big shock in fact). Though I am still sad over the news, but nevertheless there will definitely be a solution to the problem.

Don't ever lose faith, for the battle has only just begun.

Been neglecting this place for sometime. A few reasons, one - no time to blog, two -no inspiration, hence the lack of "proper" posts these past few weeks.

Now that I am finally done with all the papers, perhaps I can have more time to re-indulge in some philosophical pondering and get inspiration for the blog posts.

On a side note, I really hope to find a good supervisor for HT. Dr Sandy is good, but I still have a lot of persuasion to do in order to find a co-supervisor, otherwise all the effort so far will go to waste =(

Or maybe I should just stick to doing other topics or modules?

"I'm famous for my motivational skills. Everyone always says they have to work a lot harder when I'm around." - Homer

Hope that gives everyone enough motivation to study~! cos Homer will be watching you =P

"If success is determined by the number of steps you have taken, just look down and you will be surprised by how much you achieved. But there are many more steps in front (CP,2010)"

The Spelling Bee Competition for the P5/6 is fantastic. Some of the kids really amazed me when they can spell words that I didn't expect them to (after all I got the words straight from the dictionary). Either that or maybe I underestimated their abilities. oops.

Inspiration from Akeelah and the Bee. Wow!

Sometimes I wonder whether I should leave the situation as it is and don't bother making my life that miserable. Since the problem has been stuck for so long and there is still no solution in sight. Such a awkard situation yesterday, I don't even know why she can behave like nothing happen when I am trying to avoid her.

That one entire year of "friendship" gone just like that. Maybe that one year when I thought the times was happy and it meant something to everyone doesn't mean anything at all.

Perhaps pretending to be strangers could be a way out eventually. And I should stop thinking about it and focus my attention on the others who have supported me all this time.

Nevertheless, I'm glad there are angels who are still disguised all around me, even after the situation threatened to push us apart. Thanks people =)

Some inspirational stuff to motivate everyone who are busy studying/doing reports/rushing projects. Special thanks to nana for finding the quote below. Thanks lots =)

"If you take a nap now, you will dream, but if you study now, you will have your dreams coming true." via @Liccalika

Jiayou everyone!

Getting extremely unmotivated to study as the days progress. Is this what we call "burnout"?

I don't want to play Pokemon anymore, I want to study. Arghh. Someone gimme some extrinsic motivation (since intrinsic is not working) to mug.

The last PE session was quite a shock. Simon didn't realise there was a session for the P3/P4 and we had to do an impromptu brainstorming for the lesson plan.

Anyway the entire story goes like this. Last saturday was supposedly the term review for the project, and we had a meeting with the teachers in the morning. I was rather impressed with the meeting flow, all the teachers contributed to the discussion and they didn't really "ignore" our points that we brought up as well.

Not that I purposely wanted to say those words, but we are the youngest among the group, and there is of course a tendency that they will treat our points as irrelevant or not important. I have seen so many examples when senior management thinks their points are correct and doesn't give a hoot about what the rest says.

But that is not the main story. I did learnt a lot from this meeting, and gained more experience with dealing with problematic kids (or at least I believed so). Nevertheless, after meeting we went for lunch and wanted to get a birthday cake for huihui. While we were eating together with simon, he told us that there was a lesson and that he forgot about it. Oh my, I got such a big shock. The time was about 145pm, and the class starts at 3pm.

Fortunately we realised that there are chinese chess in the cupboard and we ended up teaching the kids how to play =)

p.s It's quite a sight to see kids queuing up to receive huihui's birthday cake. haha I wished I was young again

Dealing with people matters is probably the most difficult thing to do in this world.

You do this, and there will be impact on a few people, you do that, then it will affect other people as well. Don't do anything, it will still have an effect. Given such dilemma, how do we tell which of the decision is the best among them all?

While I was watching the film titled "12 Angry Men", one thought came to my mind. How do we essentially know which is the correct decision to make? Sometimes, the majority agreement does not necessarily meant that their answer is right (As shown in the movie). Especially when it is in an ambiguous situation without full information all the time.

Very often it just take one strong opinion and a charismatic leader and decision can be swayed towards a particular direction. What I often find is that, sometimes there is not much deliberate thought before doing the decision, or the deliberation is just not enough. Once you have an opinion, it is far likely that you will try to confirm your hypthosis than discomfirm it.

So when every decision made is based on the knowledge of some people, we might end up in a groupthink trap. But then, very often we don't have the luxury of time when deciding on matters. After all, there are so many more things to do, by the time you get back to evaluating your initial argument, time is up and the effect is permanent.

So this post is dedicated to everyone who are decision-makers, be it a big or small matter. It is extremely important to think and get a third party opinion. Sometimes I will wish to do so.

Or perhaps I was never suitable for a position like this and should continue to be a introverted mugger, who aims to be a librarian for life.

"Emotions kills reason." Evaluate this claim.

ohmygod, totally didn't expect this kind of question to come out for the midterms. Nevertheless, 2 midterms down and last one to go. And not forgetting the emotions presentation, the group dynamics tutorial presentation and the MNO video.

All due within the next few weeks. Arghh =(

Pardon for the lack of updates. As usual, not much events happening recently that seemed interesting enough to be posted here.

Chinese New Year is becoming like a rountine, so I am not exactly excited to blog about it. After all its always house visiting followed by mahjong, eat, poker, eat, eat, sleep, eat. What is special this year is Recess week is the same week! Omg I hate it when I gotta study for mid terms and do essays when its the festive mood.

Its time to study for emotions mid terms, and also to finish up on the video project as well as a very weird "blind date" tutorial project. haha. Anyway, I am so contemplating whether to sign up for YOUTHSlead 2010. Seriously tempted to get this cool experience (recommended by huihui) but I wonder whether I have the time to commit.

Let me go sleep over it. Its surfing this weekend again =)

p.s I like the powerpoints lots.

My first time taking over the class. Super nervous in the beginning but I gradually got the hang of it.

Fortunately the students seemed manageable. Or was it because of the fact that I used "Mr Heng" aka "Mr Tan number 2" ?? haha.

Anyway we started with watching the second part of the movie of "Akeelah and the bee" for the 1st hour. Our second activity was a variant of the spelling bee competition. We split the students into 4 groups and each group has to memorise 4 list of words within 20mins. We also asked each group to think of a word to be used to test the others in the bonus round later.The game started with each member going up at least once in each round to answer the spelling. Correct answer will get 1 point. After that the next member go up and answer and this continues for 2 rounds. At the last round, each group can send a representative to go up to spell the word that another group has written down. Each correct answer will get 2 points. The word that other groups have written is not listed in the word list, as such it requires the person to really break up the words and spell them out.

First session for the new year and it's great that it all went smoothly =)

Don't really like to ramble about the daily activities on my blog, but I am seriously super sian.

Why do the prof want to put the mid term test immediately after recess week?? And why did the school have to put the recess week together with the chinese new year week?? Why does everyone get to go out and I gotta stay at home and mug for the test??

Oh well. Such rambling doesn't really solve anything. End of post. Now its back to mugging.

That's why I still choose Yale to NUS (If I have the choice).

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tGn3-RW8Ajk

Of course that is not a sign that NUS is bad in anyway. I am still glad that I made it here. University is still the best years of my life. We have cca cultures, hall culture, but it seems we still lack that NUS spirit. I can't really grapple what it is. Maybe because it is not distinctive enough.

That sparkle in the eye whenever the school is mentioned. I can't seem to feel it. But nevertheless, its a cool video. haha

Actually I don't know what else to say. I don't know whether to blog this out or not. But oh well.

We came.
We trained.
We tried.
But sometimes effort does not equate result.
I'm sorry.

Even if it is only by just 1 point.

Is there such a thing as a permanent group?

I don't really have an answer. After all that has happened the past few days, I really pondered over this question hard. It started out with the question as to why people join groups?

It seems that people join groups for a variety of reasons, such as for social support in times of need, to focus on a collective task, for companionship, for prestige, and all sorts of reason. And as I wondered more about what constitues an essence of a group, it appears I can't really think of any (of course this is restricted to my own perspective as usual).

What I feel is that people join group for a reason (they can't decide to join anyone for no reason at all), and the group is supposed to be the gel to achieve the person's agenda. So when...

1) one does not feels affilated to a group,
2) the different members have different agendas,
3) the task is completed
4) the well-liked member decide to leave the group

there seems to be nothing left for that can keep the group together. Or is there something that I missed out? because if everything can be so rationally understood, then my eventual conclusion will be that one does not need a permanent group after all.

Take for example, you join a group because you feel affilated and that you have a common goal. But when the goal is completed or the affilation disappears (for a variety of reason eg. conflicts, well-liked member left etc) Will you still remain in the group?

I joined windsurfing because of all the members that I got to know then. But when these people graduate, there is not much motivation to want to continue to be in the group, especially if I don't know anyone at all. As much as I put in so much effort all this while, one day I realise I will end up leaving the group too. So why should I put in effort for something that will be gone?

Using the example of family, the parents are the one who keep the "group" together. But one day they leave, will the essence of the group remains? This point shows that when members of a group leaves, the group will eventually disappear.

So in the end, can there ever be a permanent "group" where I can really anchor myself to?

大多数二十多岁的男人处于他一生中最暗淡的时刻，没事业，没钱。二十多岁的女人正处于她一生中最光彩的时刻，她年轻，她漂亮。 所以20多岁的男人更应该珍惜在这个时候爱他的女人，因为她是用她一生中最光彩的时刻来陪伴你一生中最暗淡的时刻!

kapo from kelvin's blog.

Just like a sunflower, life is a cycle of ups and downs. Each morning the sunflower faces towards the sun and opens up, spreading its bright yellow petals for everyone to admire. At night, it bends down and silently awaits for the next day.

Once in a while, someone will pass by and compliment you for brightening their day. That without you, their existence will never be the same. But most of the time, you will be neglected. Society itself is like that, humans are too busy to appreciate what lies along their path.

But does that mean the sunflower shouldn't open their petals then? No, because collectively, if each sunflower does not want to open up itself, the whole world will be such a dark and uninspiring place. The sunflower is the symbol of happiness.

Similarly, if each of us is like a sunflower, I urge everyone to continue to stay happy. Even when it seems that day is the worst time of your life, stay happy. Even when the whole world is against you, stay happy as well. It will be hard to do so, but you still gotta try.

Happiness is contagious. Help spread it. For tomorrow will be a better day =)

My last hurdle. Hope I made the correct decisions this time round.

GE2018/SSA2215 - The Biophysical Environment of Singapore
GE2220 - Terrestrial & Coastal Environments
PL3240 - Group Dynamics
PL3252 - Social-Cognitive Perspectives on Emotion
MNO1001- Management and Organisation

Away for SIM Windsurfing Championship 9-10 Jan. Pray for good wind =)

Sometimes I really wondered whether it is good to have so many red-tape all over the place. On the other hand, I know as well that bureaucracy is ultimately essential for every society. It forms the basic framework, creates law and order and helps to create jobs for people. One thing is for sure, this is definitely not the ideal bureaucracy that Max Weber had envisioned.

Seeing how the paperwork gets pushed all around the different departments, and how these so called high-ranking legislators give promises that they don't follow up on, I am rather disappointed with the civil service.

What is the job of the civil service? To serve the people.

If it can't even accomplish such a task, what's the use of having so many people? Perhaps the adage "too many cook spoil the soup" is indeed applicable here.

School's reopening soon. So it's about time to start mugging and pull up my CAP.

As usual resolutions for the new year (which sadly remains the same for the past few years)

show more care and concern to those around me.
be more sensitive when I speak.
achieve 4.0 GPA
save up a $10,000 bank account.
level 1 heart-to-heart with mixedrice.
teach windsurfing to the juniors.
go read up more on investing.
write out my first collection of short stories.
master french to at least intermediate level.

Wish me luck for the new year =)